Space Ramblings

SyFy Needs More Ghost Shows

syfy show

Garfield can never get enough lasagna, crackheads can never get enough crack and the SyFy channel can never get enough ghosts. Sure you might think that the 50 ghost shows that the SyFy channel already has are enough, but the painkiller addicted housewives and lab monkeys who are the only ones watching the SyFy channel can’t get enough of fake ghost shows. So it’s making more.

“Want to investigate America’s most haunted locations on a new #Syfy series?

SEEKING GROUPS OF 3-4 PEOPLE. Group can consist of friends, family members and/or couples. (All groups must have 3-4 people, so if a couple is in the group, there must also be a friend and/or family member to make it a group of 3).

Ideal groups have at least one person who is a believer in the paranormal and one who is a skeptic. It is also preferred if someone in the group is legitimately afraid of the dark.

Are you crazy? Stupid? Have no dignity whatsoever? Do you even know what dignity is? Then climb aboard the SyFy Ghost Channel Express.

Required skills.

1. The ability to see ghosts in wallpaper stains.

2. A copious supply of hallucinogens

3. Already maxed out blood and sperm donor income

4. Fake scream

5. Aspiring model/actor looking for something to do now that fake talk shows and fake dating shows aren’t on the air.

But at least this time they’re investigating “America’s Most Haunted Locations”. Before that they were investigating the least haunted locations. No wonder they weren’t getting anything.

Here’s one more thing. Can SyFy do one last name change? Change it to something like the Ghost Network or the Spook Channel or If You’re Watching This You’re Probably Incontinent.

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