Space Ramblings

My Name is Stupid

While Wal-Mart is known for dropping its prices, one West Monroe man took the ad campaign seriously when he dropped the price of a plasma television from $984 to $4.88. Police arrested Chandon L. Simms, 23, on Tuesday at the retail store on a charge of felony theft.

According to police reports, Simms carried a 42-inch Sanyo Plasma TV to a self-checkout aisle after switching the original price tag of $984 with one for only $4.88. Wal-Mart Loss Prevention officers witnessed the alleged transaction and called police.

When the store officers stopped Simms on his way out the door, he produced a receipt for a television purchased at the West Monroe Wal-Mart, authorities said. Simms told officers that he purchased a TV from the West Monroe store and planned to return that one and keep the one he purchased for only $4.88 from the Monroe store. He was then arrested and booked into the Ouachita Correctional Center.

For anyone who doesn’t realize that My Name is Earl is really a documentary, there are always incidents like this to remind you. Now if you’re going to illegally mark down a television and you don’t happen to notice that cashiers actually scan bar codes rather than just look at price tags (because let’s face it, you just are not that bright) you could at least mark it down to something remotely believable. I mean even a halfway halfwit crook should realize that not even a Wal-Mart cashier is going to be that stupid as to think that a plasma TV is being sold for 4.88 if only because the resulting sale would have produced a massive flood of idiots to drag home the latest piece of junk from China while being incredibly surprised when the whole thing catches fire.

So remember, My Name is Earl… really a documentary.

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