Space Ramblings

Burn Those Team Conan Shirts Already

It’s almost a shame that the devastating earthquake in Haiti is distracting us from what really matters, watching two millionaires battle it out over which one of them will host a late night show at 11:35 and which one of them will host it at 12 AM. It really is. I won’t deny that the meltdown is entertaining, even if it’s a little more entertaining for Letterman. I won’t deny that I feel a bit sorry for Conan, but I also won’t deny that Conan has been promoted far above his abilities, which is what got everyone into this mess in the first place. And the rest of it has taken on a life of its own.

Team Conan, quick question, if you get fired from a job, will Conan be on your team? In the real world people lose their jobs all the time. Millions of Americans lost their jobs just this year alone, without anyone being on their “team”, and they often lost it for no other reason than a company trying to bump up its stock price before the next quarter. Yes Jeff Zucker is not a great human being. He’s just like every other boss out there, barely competent and scrambling for leverage before his company is bought by someone bigger and greedier.

And Leno, Letterman and Conan, you’ve never met them. You’ve never been to their house. You’ve never worked with them. Maybe you sat in on their show once or twice and got a peek at their public personalities on display. That’s all. You don’t know who they are and you’re not qualified to pass judgment on their character. Yes Leno is out for Leno, and who’s Conan out for? Who’s Letterman out for. Who’s everyone on television out for. Themselves. And you’ve been suckered in a viral protest campaign created by the super-powerful people around Conan, who aren’t fighting for his time slot (no matter what you might think) but are putting enough pressure on NBC so Conan gets the maximum payoff before he walks out the door and goes to FOX.

That’s what Team Conan is, a way to embarrass NBC so Conan gets 40 million, not 25 million dollars. So the people around Conan claim their piece of change, particularly his agent. That’s what you’re busy arguing about, 15 million dollars, for a guy who’s a long way from the poorhouse already, while people are dying under crushed buildings in Haiti.

Go Team Conan.

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